5 Prep Questions for a New Year

by: Dan Reiland

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2019 is a month old!

• Is your direction clear?
• Are your plans complete?
• Is your lead team onboard?

5 Strategic Questions:

1) What is God saying to you?

God wants your church to thrive. It’s His church! No one cares more than He does. Don’t race ahead with your plans without asking God what He wants specifically for your church.

You may not be the senior pastor, but this is still relevant to you. Maybe you’re on staff leading a department or a volunteer leader of a small group, what is God saying to you? That may be the most important question you can ask as a leader.

This requires time from your busy schedule; a quiet cup of coffee or several cups over many days. And have a notepad or your laptop handy. What do you sense that God wants? What direction does He want you to take?

2) What changes are you making?

If there are no changes, no innovation, nothing new or next planned for 2019, you may be in for a year that looks a lot like 2018.

That may be a good thing, except for one crucial factor. It’s highly likely that you successfully led some smart changes more than a year ago that helped this year be a great one.

There is no way for a healthy and productive ministry to escape change. Nothing stays the same. The key is to make the right moves. Not change for the sake of change but make things better.

It’s usually not the best strategy to change everything all at once, instead, be selective. Focus on implementation. Do it right.

Cool and creative may be fun, but if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t matter. It has to actually work. Then while the new is working, start talking about what’s next. Don’t wait until the new and cool no longer works. If that happens, you can fix it, but it’s much more work.

3) How is your staff preparing?

Your church may be large with a big staff or a small start-up with volunteer staff, either way, your team has to be out in front of the change.

First, this means they need to have ownership and buy-in of a clear vision. Second, the strategy needs to be clear and quickly make sense to anyone on the team who sees it. And last, each person needs to have clear expectations about their responsibilities.

Equally important, your staff needs to be simultaneously working on their leadership development to shore up any skill gaps required to achieve the new and next for your church.

4) How will you measure success?

Measuring success in a spiritual realm can seem impossible, but it’s not. The subjective element of life-change isn’t the real issue of difficulty. The real challenge in measuring success is the lack of clarity in a goal and being consistent in the measurement of that goal.

The process of deciding how you will measure success, meaning specifically what you will measure, is more difficult than knowing if you achieved it or not.

This process of deciding what and how you will measure begins with being clear and honest about your vision. What are you measuring? Are you making progress? How? In what way? Do you change the goals to line up with what’s happening? That’s like when Charlie Brown shoots an arrow and then walks up and draws the target around the arrow. Draw the target first.

If you have missed the mark this year, don’t beat yourself up. Learn from your mistakes and move on. Focus on the new year.

5) Are you enthusiastic about your plans?

As the leader of the church or a leader in the church, no one will be excited if you aren’t. You can’t fake enthusiasm for long, the people will read right through that. If you and your key leaders believe in the direction and plan to get there, the congregation will too.

The plans don’t have to be perfect, but they must be clear and demonstrate forward motion. You can’t generate momentum if there is no sense of movement. If you are stuck and not sure what to do, go for small wins to start.

Genuine enthusiasm is birthed in your heart. It carries great emotion, but it’s not emotional. It’s strong and sure. It develops confidence and conviction. Genuine enthusiasm is contagious!

To summarize, Talk to God, be clear about what changes you are making, help the staff prepare, measure your results, and be enthusiastic about your plans.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Planning, strategic questions

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Your Phone Battery is Not the Only Thing that Needs Recharging

by: Dan Reiland

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You may hear “comments over coffee” about who has jobs that are easy and who has jobs that are hard. I have. They often seem to get quickly connected to levels of fatigue.

I think there is more to it than that.

Most jobs are not hard or easy by themselves; it’s context and perspective that makes the difference.

You can name teachers, plumbers, sales associates, pastors, and business owners that work very hard and some who barely work.

Each of us has a unique context and perspective that makes all the difference.

Your unique context is about your environment and circumstances.

For example, do you work at a healthy place for a boss that cares about you? I don’t mean a perfect workplace, there is no such thing, but a place that you enjoy. Or do you work in an organization (church or business) that is toxic, difficult, and drains you more than fulfills you?

Your unique perspective is what you bring to the mix, and how you see things.

For example, how well do you handle stress? How’s your family life? Are you generally a glass-half-full and grateful person? Are you in the right job? How’s your health? Do you consider yourself self-aware and secure?

These kinds of things have a significant impact on your level of energy and ability to rest and rejuvenate for the next day, next week, etc.

We need a brief set of definitions:

These are not meant to be comprehensive or clinical level definitions, but only to give a comparative framework so this post is practical and helpful.

Level 1 – Natural fatigue
This is a normal and healthy response to a day’s work. With a little chill time and a good night’s sleep, you are fresh, re-charged and good to go in the morning.

Level 2 – Over-tired
You are consistently drained more than energized, often feeling stressed, work is starting to be no fun, and you have difficulty starting your next day fresh and ready to go.

Level 3 – Approaching burnout
You almost always feel exhausted and experience little joy. You have difficulty maintaining a healthy perspective, and relationships are beginning to suffer.

This post focuses on Level 2 – Over-Tired.

So, let’s look at examples of unique context and perspective for the over-tired leader.

Your context may be pretty healthy, but your perspective is off.
For example, you work at a church you love and respect, but you try to do too much yourself, and you struggle with people pleasing.

Your perspective may be in good shape, but your context is problematic.
For example, your general self-awareness is mature, and you and your family are happy, but you work for a micro-managing boss in an environment that lacks trust.

Either one of these two examples can drain you and can cause you to be consistently over-tired. Of course, if you are in a difficult situation and you have personal struggles, that will significantly impact your ability to rest and recover.

The basics of a healthy balance for work and rest are the same for everyone. But because each person’s situation is a little different, each solution is a little different.

So rather than giving you a one size fits all list, I’m offering some options that you can choose from according to what may help you most.

The last thing I want to do is give you a list of 10 things to do when you are over-tired, so choose the options that are right for you.

The good news is that rebounding from being over-tired is very doable! And the important thing is to arrest being over-tired before you hit soul level exhaustion and burnout.

10 options that will help you prevent and recharge from being over-tired:

1) Build in some margin.

If you are like me, your days are full, and there always seems to be more to do than time allows. The solution? Pack the day even fuller! Wrong. That’s a mistake.

Instead, create some margin, a couple of short breaks during your day that allows you to catch up. And block one four-hour space during the week to handle the unexpected or get some time to be quiet and think.

2) Take a complete break from your work on your day off.

If we are honest, it isn’t always practical to completely shut down for your whole day off, but usually, a full day off needs to be a regular experience for you. This doesn’t mean you do nothing, but your day off is different.

You probably have a few errands and a to-do list of some kind. Most of us do, but that’s a different feel and rhythm. It can help energize and recharge you! Make sure to include some chill time, maybe a hobby you enjoy.

3) Raise up more volunteer leaders.

This is indeed not the primary purpose of developing volunteers, but it’s a real and needed benefit.

Even recruiting just one or two new key leaders can make a big difference. Don’t make this a chore, but part of progress and moving forward toward your vision, which also adds breath and energy to your life.

4) Empower and delegate to your volunteer leaders.

Empowerment is important enough to list separately from raising up new leaders. It’s important to trust your leaders with real responsibility, train them, communicate expectations and let them lead!

5) Establish healthy boundaries.

This is a tough one. Learning to say no at the right times to the appropriate people can be difficult.

Lack of boundaries is not always about fear, people pleasing, or insecurity. Sometimes a large number of relationships in most church leader’s lives can be too much. And occasionally specific requests are unreasonable.

Saying no can be difficult, but it’s necessary.

6) Invest “fun” time into your family and meaningful relationships.

Friends and family are core to a healthy and rested lifestyle. You can increase your skill level at work to get things done faster, but you can’t rush a heart level connect with family and friends.

Make some time for the people you love the most.

7) Reduce the number of ministries the church carries.

We who are church leaders can be our own worst enemies. We can create our over-work situations by starting more ministries than any one church can do.

No single church can do every ministry. That’s not possible or smart.

So be wise and discerning about the ministries you choose for your church. Eliminate ministries that are not effective and add ministries very slowly if at all.

8) Take care of yourself physically.

I’m not going to “preach” at you about proper nutrition and exercise. You know what to do. But if this is a need for you, I do want to encourage you to take small steps in the right direction toward better overall health.

Do something that you enjoy. Do something simple like take a brisk walk after dinner. You’d be surprised at how big a difference a modest but consistent effort makes.

9) Lighten up some and laugh often.

I have a little rock on my desk that has the word “laugh” painted on it. It’s a good reminder for me.

Sometimes I get so consumed in solving problems and focused on “serious stuff” that I can go too long without lightening up, smiling, and laughing!

The good news is that I work with a bunch of awesome people who make sure there is plenty of laughter going on! That’s important!

10) Invest consistent and quality time in prayer.

We know that prayer is life-changing. The Holy Spirit brings peace, joy and rest for your soul.

Don’t make prayer a job or a task to do, sometimes all that’s needed is to sit quietly with God. Just thank Him for who He is and listen for His voice. Ask God to give you peace and rest at a soul level.

God answers that prayer if we take the time needed to slow down in His presence.

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Recharging, Work Balance, Work-Rest Balance

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5 Keys to Cultivating an Environment of Growth

by: Dan Reiland

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When it comes to faith, it’s our job as leaders to make what is intangible and supernatural, practical and assessable. That’s not easy.

In a rapidly changing culture where the Bible is an option to as many as it is the inerrant Word of God, it’s challenging to create an environment of abiding faith in Jesus.

An environment that cultivates faith is rooted in the gospel, evangelism, and prayer. Ultimately it champions and results in life change.

The idea is to create an environment where people in all stages of a relationship with God, sense a grace-filled invitation to pursue faith. From agnostic (even atheist) to those who have been to church but have become disenfranchised and have fallen away.

It also includes mature Christians who have faith but desire greater faith. For example, maybe moving their prayer life from routine to believing for a miracle. Again, it’s not easy to reach this diverse of a crowd all at the same time.

The process of spiritual understanding and maturation is not a fast one. We lead toward “decisions” and that is good, but in the end, process and practices grow faith one day at a time over a lifetime.

It’s not wise to try to shortcut this process. That’s not a lack of evangelistic zeal; it’s a realization that faith can’t be rushed. Allow the Holy Spirit to move and give him the time and space required.

Cultivating a faith environment:

1) Communicate hope.

Developing faith is difficult for people in a culture that does not intuitively trust God or is at least inconsistent in their trust of God.

Let them know that even though you fully believe and trust God, there are times of uncertainty. Yet at the same time, you know that God is present, active, faithful and loves you unconditionally.

This helps establish your credibility to then communicate your hope and faith in their better future.

Essentially, your faith rubs off! It’s contagious. They see you as real and begin to believe they can experience hope for a better future too. (This is obviously not limited to a Sunday morning worship experience.)

2) Demonstrate acceptance and lean into the Gospel.

Faith is at the center of the four gospel accounts, along with love.

One of the most recognizable verses of all time is John 3:16..

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 

The foundation of the gospel is unconditional love. Only faith (belief) is required.

The next verse is not quoted nearly as often but is vitally instructive in this process.

For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

John 3:17

God accepts each person as they are, and it’s our great privilege and responsibility to do the same in our churches. It’s only after initially trusting God that there is an appropriate challenge to grow in their faith.

3) Make faith challenges doable.

For those that experience the miraculous early on in their faith development, that’s great, but that may not be the pattern over decades to come. Therefore, a consistent and steady pursuit of faith is often best over the long haul.

What can you believe God will do? That’s a helpful question. That’s not the same as, “What do you believe God can do?” The first reveals a person’s faith, the second reveals a person’s understanding of who God is.

You know God can do anything, because of your knowledge and relationship with Him. In short, your maturity. There are many in your church who cannot yet grasp this concept.

For example, can they trust Him with their marriage, their money, or their job? Anyone of those can be overwhelming.

This isn’t about dumbing down God to our level; it’s about helping believers rise to understand and embrace the fullness of God.

4) Emphasize do’s over don’ts.

It’s true that the Scriptures contain numerous things we should not do, and we can’t ignore that instruction. However, a steady diet of mostly “thou shall not’s”, defeats faith and discourages progress.

First, in the natural realm, the person gives up on their ability to live up to the standards of a growing faith and Christian maturity.

Second, they can become discouraged that a Christian lifestyle is just not achievable, even with God’s help.

A balance of admonition and encouragement is important, but the presence and power of the Holy Spirit has a way of increasing what is pleasing to God, and slowly eliminating the things that break His heart.

5) Tell stories that inspire faith.

Few things are more inspiring than real stories of people engaging their faith.

Tell stories and show video interviews of people trusting God with their money, trusting God with their time (serving), and of course salvation.

Baptism stories are among my favorites. In one minute, you catch a glimpse of someone’s early faith story. There is nothing more powerful, more captivating, or that cultivates faith better than a fresh conversion story followed by a live baptism!

And when you also add in stories of marriages that have been restored, addictions that have been broken, and physical sickness that has been healed, faith increases for nearly everyone.

This is not a comprehensive list, but it can serve as a helpful guideline or conversation starter to evaluate if your church environment is what you want it to be.

It’s easy to get caught up in the mechanics of ministry, and you may risk missing the heart of your purpose. I hope that this post may help you process the very thing you are passionate about!

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Cultivating growth, Dan Reiland, Growth, environment of growth

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Visionary Leaders Should Stop Doing These Seven Things

by: Dan Reiland

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As leaders, we have a finite amount of energy.

We either use that energy wisely or waste it. And one thing for sure, we never get it back.

Each day presents us with 24 hours in which our physical, mental, spiritual and emotional capacity is packaged. That capacity is dispersed through our God-given human energy. At the end of each day, our batteries need to be recharged.

There are some responsibilities you carry as a leader that tend to zap and drain your energy more than others. Things like a confrontational conversation that carries emotional intensity, or working on complex details of your church budget.  But you must still do them anyway.

There are other things we do as leaders that consume and deplete our energy that we don’t have to do, and in fact, should stop doing.

The scary thing is that they are sometimes embedded in our habits in such a way that we don’t realize we’re doing them. And even more scary, sometimes we do know and do them anyway.

So, I’ve written an important list of things that if you stop doing, you’ll accomplish more, realize a rise in your stamina (energy), and overall experience a higher level of satisfaction.

This is a unique list of practical items that don’t fit within one specific category and yet are essential for you and me as leaders to make sure we stop doing.

(Note: There are entire categories not included such as your spiritual life, practical ministry, etc.)

Which one(s) speaks to you today?

7 Things Leaders Should Stop Doing:

1) Worrying about what others think of you.

You will be misunderstood, and you will make unpopular decisions, and not everyone will like you. If you lay awake at night worrying about these things, they’ll eat you alive.

It’s not easy, but let it go. That doesn’t mean you become callous and or pretend you don’t care. It means do the right things, with wise counsel, and keep going.

2) Procrastinating difficult conversations.

If you’ve been leading for a while, you know that putting off a tough conversation only makes it worse. You will likely imagine it more difficult than it will actually be, which is energy draining, and the delay allows the problem to become larger.

Don’t move so fast that you are not prepared, but facing the tough conversations quickly often gives energy.

When you have the difficult conversation, you feel a sense of accomplishment, and often a relief, because it went better than you expected.

3) Showing up unprepared.

I know what it’s like to have a full schedule, with many things required of me and a to-do list that’s never done. It’s tempting to show up unprepared, almost “justifiable,” but it’s never a good idea.

In everything from the next talk you’ll give, to a meeting you’ll lead, the anxiety caused by not being prepared drains far more energy needed to prepare. And of course, you never feel good about it afterward.

4) Focusing on results over relationships.

As a leader, you are expected to produce results and simultaneously develop relationships. This is never easy, and it nearly always creates pressure if you allow results to rise above relationships.

Focusing on results over relationships may seem expedient at the moment, even pressure relieving, but over the long haul, it’s costly. The relational price tag is incredibly draining.

The bottom line is that over time, if you tend to genuine nurture and development of relationships, while you work diligently toward results, the fruit of your ministry will be greater and last longer.

5) Expecting those who follow you to know what you’re thinking.

There are two items on this list that speak to me personally, and this is one.

In some strange way, I have occasionally caught myself assuming others around me should know what I’m thinking. Perhaps I have allowed myself to assume something like, “Well, we’ve worked together a long time, they should know.” No, they shouldn’t.

That kind of faulty assumption is an energy killer because it wastes so much time, and it’s often counterproductive. If left unchecked over time, it can even cause conflict.

Speak up, make yourself clear, let those you work with know what you’re thinking.

6) Doubting yourself.

This is simultaneously a massive energy consumer.

Self-doubt often comes from things like the lies we believe, comparisons, and past failures. It results in a lack of confidence.

Risks are required, and we all make mistakes. That’s part of life as a leader. And no leader is a stranger to at least some insecurity.

Remember that God is with you. Recall your past successes, give yourself permission to make mistakes, seek wise counsel and go for it. Personal momentum will overcome self-doubt.

7) Allowing email to run your life.

How many emails do you receive a day? How many do you send? I’ll bet the number is large, maybe even staggering. Email can suck your energy dry!

Half of your email is junk, and that takes only seconds to delete. It’s the other half that can consume you.

If you are like me, you want to be helpful. People write to you and you know you can make a difference, yet realistically you can’t answer every email or help everyone that lands in your inbox.

First, identify what email you must answer. Start with the priorities. Email from your boss, your team and the things you are immediately working on. From there, you need to become more discerning.

Can someone else help you respond? Perhaps set aside two hours a week and do what you can, and the rest need to wait. The point is, don’t let email run your life.

This was the second one on the list I’m working on.

Did you find one or two that speaks to you?

What one thing would you add to the list for leaders to stop doing?

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Leadership mistakes

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4 Critical Questions to Make Great Decisions

by: Dan Reiland

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Decision-making is an essential skill for effective leadership. It’s non-negotiable for making progress in a healthy organization.

• Insecurities can cause you to procrastinate in making a decision.
• Fear can prevent you from making a decision at all.

No leader wants to make a wrong decision, but you can’t avoid risks. You will make mistakes. The goal is to make many more good decisions than bad ones.

The encouraging news is that decision-making is a skill, you can practice and get better at it.

There are two key factors in decision-making.

1. Accuracy: making the right decision at the right time.
2. Speed: making the decision as quickly as reasonably possible.

The first factor involves making the best decision. There will be several potentially good choices, and your job as a leader is to make the best choice at the right time.

The second factor is about making the decision as quickly as prudence will allow. You can’t rush the process, but it’s far more common to go too slow than too fast. In fact, it’s not uncommon that a leader knows the right decision but just won’t pull the trigger.

What prevents making the decision?

Two primary components:

• The objective component — insufficient information.
• The subjective component — lacking in wisdom.

Insufficient information and a lack of wisdom result in a lack of confidence.

In question form, they look like this:

1. Are you not making the decision because you need more information?
2. Are you not making the decision because you are not sure what to do?

There is a significant difference between needing additional information and having all the information you need, but you still don’t know what to do.

Gathering relevant information is a finite process and can be done with relative speed. It is not necessary to accumulate infinite amounts of data to make a good decision.

Wisdom is different, it’s more subjective, but it’s not elusive. You can have all the information, but still be unsure or unwilling to make the decision. However, when you include your best advisors in thought and prayer, you can gain the wisdom you need.

Then it’s about courage. Make the decision.

It’s fear and or insecurity that shuts decision-making down at this point in the process.

When you know you have all the information you need, and your wise counsel gives a green light, make the decision and act!

I know it’s still not easy to make a tough decision. So, let me offer four good questions that are helpful in the decision-making process.

4 helpful questions:

Does it matter?

I can’t tell you how much time I’ve wasted on deciding whether a training meeting should be on Saturday morning or Monday night. You could probably give an example or two of things you have deliberated on that were just not that important.

And remember, if you decide and no one gets upset, you just made a decision that doesn’t matter.

What are the risks?

Is the risk worth the reward?

Write down the risks you see in play. Are there other alternatives to lessen the risk that still provide the results you want? If not, are you willing to take the risk, yes or no?

Any important decision you make has a risk factor. As I’ve said, risk is inescapable.

Evaluating the risk also requires the incredibly important factor of writing down the potential results of not taking the risk. Avoiding the risk may seem safer at the moment, but in the long run, it can be disastrous for the church.

Do you know all that can be known?

• Have you done all your homework?
• Is the research complete?
• What is left that you need to know?
• Can you get this information on your own or do you need help?
• Do you need to hire a consultant to help you accurately gather all the information you need?

When you know you have enough information, make a mental declaration, or a public one to your key leaders that “We have all the info we need.”

“It’s time to decide, so team, do we have a sense of the right decision? Do we have the wisdom we need?”

Again, like information, if you don’t have the wisdom, get it from other sources. God does not lack in wisdom; it is available if you ask.

Does the decision require soak time?

There are a few decisions that even when you have all the information and wisdom, you still need some time to let it marinade.

My practical advice is that you usually don’t need long to decide. Sometimes a few days, maybe a few weeks, on very rare occasions a few months.

Take the time you need to soak and pray. Make sure you know God’s mind, but your decision is not a mystery to God, and if it’s about His work, He’s not likely to withhold from you.

If it’s an issue of timing, you can still make the decision and put a date on when you activate the decision.

Ultimately, following the practical guidance in this post will help you not only make decisions, but make better decisions, and increase your confidence for future decisions.

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Decision making

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These Few Keys Create Great First Impressions

by: Dan Reiland

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The first ten seconds matter, and in the first ten minutes decisions are being made.

For example, when I walk into a hotel, a concert venue, or a retail store, within seconds the first things I encounter have made an impression on me. Either positive or negative.

I’ve walked into restaurants that were so bad, I literally froze in the doorway and said to my wife Patti, “We are not eating here.” We were really hungry, but we left!

In contrast, I recently walked into an incredible hotel. It was stunning, and within minutes I told Patti, I’m not sure we’re ever going home!

Your church creates the same effect. One way or the other. Your guests make lightning-fast decisions about your church. No church is perfect, we are all working on stuff, but we can’t afford to mess up on the first impression.

If your first impression is positive, you gain instant grace for any other element of your church overall that needs improvement.

If your first impression is negative, it is far more difficult for a guest to overlook any less than inspiring element of your church.

8 Key First Impressions:

1) Clearly marked street signs directing where to turn into your church.

Not every church comes with several police officers and a couple of hundred orange cones to make plain where to turn in from the main road. Even with sophisticated GPS apps like WAZE, that final turn is often the most confusing. Make sure it’s marked and easy to see.

2) Friendly parking lot attendants.

I’ve pulled into churches on vacation or places I’ve consulted, and it seemed like the parking lot attendants were angry with me. Hey, I’ve never been there and don’t know where to go! At other churches, they seemed bored. But the ones I love have me smiling before I get out of my car! They are waving, saying good morning, directing, some even wearing giant Mickey Mouse hands! I instantly think… “I like this place!”

3) Well maintained landscaping and buildings.

Everyone notices when they drive onto a property and see a professionally maintained look. It signals that you care and subtly hints toward a good experience inside. You don’t have to spend a fortune; you may even have professionals in your church that will offer you a discount to take good care of your property.

4) Warm and engaging greeters and ushers.

Your greeters and ushers are of utmost importance. They are among the first smiles and personal conversations once a guest is out of their car. World-class hospitality is essential. A bored, untrained or distracted greeter might ensure your guest does not return. An usher who is talking to his or her buddies and doesn’t make eye contact can sour a guest’s experience. Nothing is too small to pay attention to.

5) Clear and informative interior signage.

The larger the church building, the more critical the signage is, but even in small churches clear signage is vital! For example, clear signage to the bathrooms can make a guest feel at ease rather than frustrated! Clear signage to the nursery is also a top priority.

6) A clean and well-staffed nursery.

For any family that has infants or toddlers, this is mission-critical. If your nursery doesn’t seem safe or clean, they will not likely trust their child to your care. And more importantly, they may not return.

7) Worship service starts on time.

Americans in general are time conscious. Perhaps we shouldn’t be clock watchers, but it’s part of our culture. When you start late, or your service runs over, that feels disrespectful. It communicates that the church’s agenda is more important than your guest’s plans for the rest of the day.

8) Elements of surprise and delight!

The first-time guests were seated, and the husband asked for a blanket for his wife. An unusual request, but the usher learned that his wife was undergoing chemotherapy and felt cold nearly all the time. The church didn’t have blankets, but the usher said, “I’ll get one right away.” He ran to his car and got a blanket from his trunk and gave it to the guest with cancer. This couple still attends that church!

Surprise and delight might not be that dramatic, but notice how simple it was. It can be humor during the service, or maybe a small gift like chocolate for first-time guests. Don’t underestimate the positive impact of surprise and delight!

> Read more from Dan.

Learn more about your developing your first impressions – start a conversation with Guest Experience Navigator Bob Adams.

Tags: Dan Reiland, First Impressions, Guest Experiences

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Phrases That Welcome – And Repel – First Time Guests

by: Dan Reiland

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Every new guest is a sign that you are doing something right, and an opportunity to change a life.

Each new guest represents an opportunity to influence their life toward Jesus, and by His power, they can be transformed. But they need to come back for greater opportunity to impact their life.

The return rate of your guests is more important than the actual number of your guests. Of course, it’s always better to have more guests, but let me explain what I mean.

For example, it’s better to have 25 guests a week with 15 returning, than 50 guests a week with 10 returning. We often get more excited about the more significant numbers, but guest engagement will always beat out guest attraction over the long haul.

The truth is that it’s easier to attract a guest than to engage a guest. It’s similar to the mall nearest your house. They can attract shoppers during the holidays, but it doesn’t mean the shoppers will buy something or come back.

Every time someone in your church invites a guest, they are taking a risk that the staff, volunteers and regular attenders will treat each one with honor, kindness, hospitality, and respect. The better your teams are trained and prepared, the lower the risk.

It’s always disappointing when you invite someone, and they won’t come, but it’s devastating when someone does come, but because of their experience won’t come back.

6 Worst Phrases:

These are the most common things ushers, greeters, staff and key leaders say that repel rather than engage your church guests.

1) “You must be a first-time guest.”

This infers that something about them doesn’t fit. For example, perhaps they are dressed up, and your church is casual. Or they arrive halfway through the service because they didn’t know what time it started. Instead, say something like “I’m so glad you are here!”

2) “Your kid is crying.”

Yikes, really?! But it’s true, this is said! First-time guests are reluctant to leave their child in the nursery but will try it. Don’t reward that risk with a slam. Instead, say something like: “Your child is having a tough time without you, everything is fine, and we can handle it, but thought you might like to know if you want to come check on him.”

3) “I don’t know.”

This often translates in your guest’s mind and heart as, “I don’t care.” If you don’t know the answer, that’s okay, but instead say something like: “Let me find the answer for you.”

4) “We’ll need you help in the nursery next week.”

Yup, I’ve seen it happen! And literally heard, “Okay, your first week is ‘on us’ but if you return you have to help.” Instead try, “We are so happy to serve you and your family and hope to see you next week!”

5) “You look tired.”

Please avoid and refrain from any subjective comments about a guest’s demeanor or appearance even if your intent is kindness or compassion. This kind of commentary infers that you are evaluating them. Instead, say a simple “Good morning!” which is always appropriate.

6) “That seat is saved.”

That’s close to “We don’t really want you here.” Instead, offer to give up your seat, or tap a committed volunteer on the shoulder who you know would love to give up their seat for a guest.

It is said that “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.” There is a lot of truth in that, but I don’t fully agree with that statement. I think it’s what you say AND how you say it.

Two of the things that can make or break your church on a Sunday morning are:

• Your choice of words. (Action)
• Your heart behind those words. (Attitude)

6 Best Phrases:

1) “May I help you?”

Your guest may be fumbling with an umbrella or negotiating a stroller through the front door, or a family is arriving with several kids. Offering to help is a fantastic way to engage a new guest.

2) “I’ll walk with you.”

Never point, always offer to go with the person. It may only be a 30-second walk, but in that 30 seconds, you have an amazing opportunity to connect with that person.

3) “My name is Dan, what’s yours?”

Offer your name and ask for theirs. A person’s name is deeply personal to them. If you make an effort to ask for their name, it shows you value and care about them as a person.

4) “Can I get you a cup of coffee?”

Don’t worry about whether or not they drink coffee, or might turn down your offer. The gesture matters. The important thing is that if they say yes, you are genuinely happy to get them a cup and make it just like they like it! Serving someone is a powerful form of engagement.

5) “Let me introduce you to my friend ‘David.’”

Helping a guest meet a person or two is a fantastic way to increase engagement. Don’t be pushy, keep it real and natural. But as the opportunities arise, make the introduction. Keep it short and simple.

6) “Is there anything I can do for you?”

This might sound like a summary or catch-all phrase, but it’s an important way to establish early on that you want them to enjoy the best experience possible and that you will go out of your way to be helpful; this is endearing and engaging.

> Read more from Dan.

Learn more about the power of your church’s first impression – connect with Guest Experience Navigator Bob Adams.

Want to learn how to create an EXCEPTIONAL Guest Experience at your church?Check out Auxano’s Guest Experience Boot Camp in Cincinnati, OH on August 7-8.

Tags: Church Guest Experience, Dan Reiland, Guest Experiences, Welcome phrases

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3 Qualities of a Self-Controlled Leader

by: Dan Reiland

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Every time I see a homemade chocolate chip cookie fresh out of the oven my self-control is pushed to its limits.

What’s your temptation?

What about the more serious kinds of temptations leaders face when it comes to self-control?

Under pressure it’s easy to be swayed by your own emotions, make reactionary decisions, or be tempted to trade long term success for more immediate rewards.

Self-control is the ninth and last in the list of fruit of the Holy Spirit. It has always appeared to me like an out of place add-on at the end of a list of positive attributes.

²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness and self-control.

Galatians 5:22-23

It appears like it’s the only fruit that is defense and the other eight are offense.

But I’ve learned to see self-control not as the caboose at the end of a powerful train, but the backstop. Without it, the others may easily be lost.

Love may be the engine that pulls the locomotive, but self-control is what keeps it on the tracks.

Without self-control, a leader will be sidelined, derailed, or perhaps taken out of ministry.

You may need self-control to win over anger, discouragement or speaking too quickly. Another leader may need self-control for their thought life, managing money or how they use their authority.

None of us escape the great need for consistent self-control.

What is the area you have greatest need to exercise self-control?

Developing self-control:

1) Embrace the significance of life’s daily trades.

All of life consists of daily trades, and over your lifetime the wisdom of your trades becomes very evident.

I’ve made some poor trades along the way. Like trading my potential safety and the well-being of others in order to arrive somewhere faster. Yup. Speeding. Not cool, but I’ve done it.

That may seem like a relatively minor “poor” trade, but not really. I’m just banking on not getting caught. That’s the dark side of making bad trades. Hoping you won’t get caught, or at least no consequence or penalty.

There are more serious trades, but in the moment we can rationalize that they are minor. Like making an optional big purchase when you should be saving money.

It’s always about the bigger picture, and self-control or lack thereof is always involved.

In leadership it might be trading frustration for patience toward an employee, or trading lazy for study in developing a sermon. It might be trading a hurtful word for an encouraging word, or trading compassion instead of comfort.

Most of life is won or lost in these daily trades. These decisions develop patterns that determine the course and outcomes of your life and leadership.

2) Engage the wisdom of pay now and play later.

If you play now you will pay later. It’s not possible to alter the reality of that life principle. This is true in all areas of life, especially leadership.

The wisdom of delayed gratification (pay now play later) is a significant part of making smart daily trades. Self-control and smart daily trades go hand and hand to help you exercise discipline now and enjoy more freedoms later.

Think long-term, values-driven and character-based to build the right foundation to support self-control. This kind of “pay now” character yields the life and leadership you desire.

Discipline now rewards you with the freedom and options that allow you to live well and lead well.

Resist the desire to play now, and lean into the exponential dividends of discipline today. This paves the way for greater rewards in the future.

3) Ask God to help you do what you can’t do.

When it comes to self-control I think God wants to see some effort on my part. If I ask God to remove the need for any work, or even struggle on my part, there is no process that leads to maturity.

The process toward spiritual maturity requires that I face and handle real life tensions that don’t have easy solutions. That’s when God steps in.

As we pray and ask for help, God is eager to grant the power of the Holy Spirit that helps provide the self-control we need. Ultimately, this strengthens the first eight in the list of the fruit of the spirit.

It’s always been about a divine partnership. You do your part, God does His. It’s not works, it’s grace.

The quest is not for perfect leadership or discipline for the sake of discipline. Leaders with great self-control are still human beings who make mistakes, and fall short on occasion.

The point is that the seldom spoken of # 9 in the list of the fruits of the spirit, may just be a quiet key to much of your long term health and success as a leader.

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Leader, Self Control, Self-Controlled Leader

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3 “Check Engine” Lights for Pastors

by: Dan Reiland

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Discipleship is core to what we do as a church.

However, discipleship represents something much more than a program. Discipleship is something bigger than an institution that “organizes” a process for spiritual growth. 

We are the church, and we are disciples!

That represents a significant challenge; how to organize something in the natural realm that inherently belongs in the supernatural realm.

This is a huge subject. And, I’d like to focus on a specific slice of the discipleship arena, centering on these three questions:

• How do you as the pastor live above the warning signs?
• How do you as the pastor personally fit into a process of discipleship?
• How do you as the pastor or church staff member, develop your spiritual vitality?

One “simple” answer is, “participate in a small group.” That’s good, and can work well, but it usually ends up with the pastor (or staff member) leading the group. So now the pastor is back to leading and organizing which can lessen the personal spiritual impact.

Another solution is, “get in an accountability group.” That’s good too, but most often those groups are not designed to make intentional forward and measured progress. They are more open than structured, and usually designed to keep a check on what is happening in the present.

This reality can leave the pastor and staff of the church without an intentional spiritual growth process.

It’s often difficult to discern the level of your spiritual growth when you are professionally immersed in spiritually oriented church work.

The following are three warning signs of your personal spiritual vitality.

3 warning signs to pay attention to:

1) Past training begins to cover for lack of current freshness.

Putting a price tag on great training and experience is hard. They are truly invaluable.

But there is also a risk. That theological training and ministry experience you have as the spiritual leader may place you ahead of many in the congregation, much like a doctor knows more about medicine or a lawyer has studied the law.

However, if the doctor or lawyer relies on what they learned years ago, they will lack the necessary freshness to what is new in the field, and they can lose touch or even become irrelevant.

It’s true that scripture doesn’t change like medicine or law. But we change, culture changes, and we engage every person right where they’re at in the moment. In fact, scripture says about itself, “. . . the word of God is alive and active.” Hebrews 4:12

There is a certain “freshness” about what God is doing today that matters. Including in your personal spiritual life as a pastor.

2) Leadership responsibilities begin to choke out growth in your faith.

The ideal picture is that the larger our respective responsibilities grow, the greater our dependence upon God becomes.

However, it’s all too common that the great beauty of the church becomes more of the beast. Or, it sometimes feels that way. But I assure you, the church is a thing of amazing beauty. So, when it looks or feels like the beast, it’s time to discern why.

Part of the why is that you are intricately involved in a never-ending process of helping people grow in their faith. And the irony is that you as the pastor can end up spiritually dry.

The good squeezes out the great. It’s good to serve and minister. But it’s great to foster spiritual intimacy and pursue greater faith.

Galatians 6:9 reminds us to “not become weary in doing good.” But that can be twisted only to mean “never stop.”

When in fact what is needed most to keep you going as a spiritually healthy leader, is to take regular time out to focus on your personal spiritual growth. The very thing you help others experience, you can overlook for yourself.

3) The miraculous starts to become mundane.

When profound life change like salvation, restoring of marriages, or someone breaks free from an addiction, becomes business as usual, that’s a warning sign.

When life change seems more like an organizational success rather than a heart-stirring, moving, eternity-changing moment, that’s a warning sign.

I’ve experienced it personally. It’s not a good place to be as a spiritual leader. If it’s short-lived, it’s pretty natural and normal, but if allowed to persist it’s a bigger deal.

Every time I watch a baptism, there is a certain awe and wonder that is directly connected to the mystery of the gospel. Skill and systems are necessary, but we can never let them trump the majesty and power of God.

All of these things are part of the deeper process and the larger context of personal discipleship and spiritual growth for the pastor.

5 practical questions to help keep your personal spiritual vitality alive and well:

1. What was the last thing God said to you and when?
2. Are you quick to follow the everyday prompts of the Holy Spirit?
3. What “spiritual life” book you are currently reading that is not part of your teaching preparation?
4. Are you in community with a few believers where you are known intimately, and you can be challenged and encouraged in your faith?
5. Is your prayer life all that you want it to be right now? If not, what is preventing it from becoming all that you want it to be?

I pray this post is of great encouragement to you.

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Spiritual vitality

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5 Secrets to Inspiring Others

by: Dan Reiland

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Inspiring those you lead, is a skill all leaders are responsible to practice.

It’s a misnomer to think that only the senior leaders in the church carry the role of inspiring others.

When I was a young leader, I was captivated by the skill level of lead pastors in mega churches. I quickly assumed that the role of inspiration was a unique responsibility only they carried. It took me years to learn that was not true.

Not all leaders are as inspirational as others, but all leaders must inspire, or their leadership will be capped.

The size of a few leader’s gifts and skill level do not relieve the rest of us of our full leadership responsibilities, including inspiration.

Inspiration is not a stand-alone skill. It requires other supporting skills underneath such as the ability to connect with, appreciate and encourage people. Without these three skills, inspiring others will be difficult for you as a leader.

The primary purpose of inspiration is to move people in the direction of the vision and mission of the church, which ultimately is about their spiritual growth and resulting life change.

People who experience life change will reach others, and your church will grow.

The beauty of inspiration and explanation for why some leaders with great charisma inspire differently than others are that God made us all differently. He wired us to inspire people in different ways.

I discuss this in more depth in my book Amplified Leadership, but for now, let me give you a quick list of the five primary ways leaders inspire.

• Relationship – You are so good with people they are inspired because of how you love and care for them.
• Strategy – People hate chaos. Any leader who can organize the church to move forward and make progress is inspirational.
• Passion – Leaders who have “light up the room” personalities can leverage that in strategic ways for the mission of the church.
• Competence – Think of this one like an Olympic athlete. They are so amazingly good at what they do; when you are around them you just want to get better at what you do! Competence inspires!
• Coaching – These leaders have a special skill to bring out the best in others, it’s very inspiring.

Which one are you?

Perhaps you can add another style of inspiration.

One Essential Principle:

Before you can inspire others, as the leader, you must be inspired yourself. As a leader, it’s your job to show up inspired. No one else is responsible to pump you up!

80% of personal inspiration involves self-awareness, maturity, and discipline.

It’s like a young mom or dad with an infant. There is no one there in the middle of the night to hold a pep rally to make them get out of bed and tend to their crying infant. They just get up. They get up because they love their child and have their child’s best interest at heart. They are motivated from within.

External Inspiration

20% of personal inspiration comes from external sources, such as someone who loves and believes in you, and perhaps one of those amazing inspirational speakers.

God didn’t design us to operate independently; He created us to operate as the body of Christ. We need each other, and we help each other. Your teammates help you stay fired up during the tough seasons.

I personally can’t imagine being able to maintain my ability to inspire others without some of the champions who have believed in me over the years. I’m very grateful for their love, belief, and inspiration.

So, yes, it’s an important part of the process to receive external motivation and encouragement, so your internal inspiration gets that extra stamina.

However, I’m very aware that it’s ultimately my responsibility to be fired up about the mission of the church and helping people grow spiritually.

It’s up to me to maintain a close walk with God so the Holy Spirit can inspire me to keep going in the right direction for the right purposes. In the same way, it’s up to you.

It’s up to you to seek God and the power of the Holy Spirit, aligned with your sense of purpose and calling to remain inspired.

Three helpful practices:

1. Seek the Holy Spirit’s presence and power to keep your inner fires alive and full of passion.
2. Keep your ministry calling and purpose clear in your mind and heart.
3. Develop your discipline for the needed perseverance to keep going with that inner enthusiasm that rubs off on others.

> Read more from Dan.

Tags: Dan Reiland, Inspire, Inspiring others

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